


There is no happiness without you

by Lilith888



Series: The Chronicles of broken spells and loves [4]
Category: The Last Hours Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Mentioned James Herondale, Oral Sex, Post-Book 1: Chain of Gold
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 08:01:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29714115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilith888/pseuds/Lilith888
Summary: After discovering the power of the silver bracelet that keeps James away from them, Cordelia and Matthew find comfort in each other’s armsThis is part of my longfic The Third Ring, Chapters 28, 29 and 30 in particular, but it can be read separately.
Relationships: Cordelia Carstairs & Matthew Fairchild, Cordelia Carstairs/Matthew Fairchild
Series: The Chronicles of broken spells and loves [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2065452
Kudos: 5





	There is no happiness without you

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Third Ring](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26628391) by [Lilith888](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilith888/pseuds/Lilith888). 



She looked up at him “Come here”. 

He obliged, still afraid of what was coming next. He knew she loved James. He knew what the fact that he was under a spell could mean. Cordelia used his chest for leverage to reach his lips and kiss him. No holding back, no tenderness, just need. Matthew bent down just enough for her to deepen the kiss and intertwine her fingers in his curls. He lost himself in her but only for a few moments “We should talk”.

“About what?”

“About what this means”.

She looked at him with so much tenderness that he almost lost balance “I am kissing you because I want to, because I want to be with you. THIS doesn’t change anything”.

“But it does” why couldn’t he simply enjoy what she was offering? Even if it wouldn’t last? It was still more than he had ever hoped for.

“Are you going to run away from me to throw yourself in James’ arms the moment they are going to lift the spell?” she asked him. She was sarcastic and a little hurt too. Both the feelings well readable on her face.

“Are you serious?”

“And you? You really think this, us, means nothing for me? Always ready to ask if I am sure, waiting for me to leave you for the possibility to be with James. So now I am asking the same to you. If James walked into this room now, telling you he loves you and wants to be with you, would you leave me? You have loved him before you even knew me so, it would be normal for you to just decide to be with him rather than me”.

“Are you kidding?”

“I have never been so serious Matthew”.

“It’s not the same” and he couldn’t believe she thought they were in the same position.

“It is exactly the same”.

“He loves you, now I know for sure he does. What happened at Hypatia’s place now makes even more sense”.

“He loves you too”.

“As a friend”.

“Maybe, maybe not. But the point is that I won’t leave you, not even for him. And you?”

“Are you really asking me?”

“For the Angel! Yes Matthew! I would never assume you would lose the chance to be with him, you never promised me anything and even if you did...”

“I didn’t only because I thought it was pointless”.

“Pointless”.

“I would be an idiot to lose you. I could accept to be without you only if it was you who chooses to leave me. Only if you choose someone else to make you happy but... for me there is no happiness without you”.

“And I already told you that a life without you, even with James, wouldn’t be enough. How many times do I have to tell you before you believe me?”

“Maybe a few more?”

She looked at him and smiled “What if...” and she kissed him lightly before whispering in his ear “... what if I show you?”

They moved from the greenhouse, unable to stop kissing and caressing each other so, they moved really slow. They were  shadowhunters , but there was no training designed for moving while kissing, especially on stairs. After a couple of steps and the exact same number of almost mortal incidents, Matthew took Cordelia in his arms and quickly descended to their bedrooms floor.

Cordelia had felt bold in the greenhouse, but now, so close to her bedroom, ancient, deeply rooted fears were raising in her head. Was she sure? Was he the right man? Will he lose his interest once he had her? Will it hurt? What if she wasn’t good enough for him? He had a lot of experience and she had none. She was trying really hard to focus on the Matthew she loved and not the one he showed to everyone else when he abruptly stopped. She was holding herself to his upper arms, face in his neck and it wasn’t comfortable to turn and see what had stopped him.

“Matthew what...?” but she managed to turn and saw. She struggled to go back on her feet, but Matthew didn’t help her at all, frozen on spot, looking at a very angry Alastair.

“Alastair we...”

“Don’t even try lying to me. This is not the first time I see you two, at least then you tried to hide whatever this is”.

“This is me being in love with Matthew”.

“And what about James?”

“You very well know that there is an arrangement”.

“One that is going to ruin you”.

“I don’t care and it’s none of your business”.

“I am your brother so it IS my business”.

“I won’t stop just because you don’t like it, Alastair”.

“You are going to ruin your life”.

“Just like you did?” Cordelia didn’t want to reproach his story with Charles and surely, she didn’t want to expose his brother with Matthew. It wasn’t her secret to reveal.

“Do as you want, but I won’t be there to save you”.

“She won’t need it” Matthew finally said. He didn’t want to intrude; he didn’t want to make matters worse but he had no intention to let Cordelia be alone in this, even if he thought that Alastair didn’t deserve any explanation or justification from them.

“We’ll see” and the shadowhunter left the hallway, leaving them alone, both astonished and a little bewildered.

“That was easy” Cordelia commented.

“If you say so”.

“Believe me, it was very easy” she laughed, the tension leaving her.

“Are you okay?” he asked, still a little worried.

“Not really” she intertwined her fingers with his, pulling him toward her bedroom door “Why you are not kissing me, again?”

“We just got caught by your brother”.

“Then, maybe we should move to somewhere more” and she opened the door “private”.

Once inside Cordelia kissed Matthew before he could manage to close the door “Are you sure you are okay?”

“Stop asking, I am great. All I want now is for you to kiss me”.

“Just kissing?” he asked with a little grin, finally accepting her reassuring words to be true.

She took a couple of steps back, getting near the bed. She took away her hair clip, letting her red curls fall on her shoulders and partially cover her chest. Cordelia started to loosen her bodice, never looking at Matthew, who was drinking the sight in front of him, holding his breath, trying really hard not to run and get her undress. He wanted to take his time watching her. He wanted her to take her time and find her confidence and rhythm. Cordelia let her dress fall on the ground and gracefully stepped out of the tangle of tulle and silk. She was still wearing a powder pink slip, but she was the most sensual and beautiful thing Matthew had ever seen. She finally looked up, holding out a hand for him “Would you like to join me?”

Matthew didn’t run; he didn’t leave her to wait for him, but didn’t run either. They were hiding their relation, he gladly indulged at thinking at the word ‘relation’, but Alastair knew. James needed to know, but he had other matters in mind at the moment. So, they weren’t in a hurry, no parents to avoid, no demon to fight. Only them. Only Cordelia in her perfect beauty. He joined her near the bed and without touching her, Matthew smelled the sweet, floral perfume, lingering in her hair “Tell me, what do you want?” he asked in a whisper.

“You”.

The boy kissed Cordelia, gently holding her with one hand on her hip, the other stroking her hair “You are so beautiful” he managed to say before starting to kiss her neck.

“And you are definitely too dressed”.

Matthew was ready to indulge when he changed his mind “Do you trust me?”

Cordelia looked at him, a sarcastic grin quickly raising on her face “Should I?”

“A little late to change your mind, don’t you think?”

“I have no intention of changing my mind, but trusting the big, bad Matthew Fairchild” she kissed him “do you really think I should?”

“I... yes”.

“Then, yes”.

“Let me take this” and took the strap from her shoulder in his fingers “off”.

She nodded and when the last piece of her clothing was on the ground tried really hard not to cover herself from the hungry look of Matthew. But there wasn’t only hunger; tenderness, disbelief and affection where the things she was more than willing to be naked in front of “Are you really going to stand there all dressed up?”

“I intend to stay dressed for a little more, yes. But” he took her in his arms to drop her in the centre of the bed “the bed is definitely more comfortable”.

Matthew was again kissing Cordelia; his hands were eager to touch her body but he had other plans for all that perfect skin. His mouth moved to her ear, the neck under it, the collarbone he had watched with desire every time it showed under a dress. He kissed and sucked, making it flush. When he reached her breasts, choosing the first to suck was almost impossible. Cordelia moaned and called his name when he took the other in his hand. He kept kissing her, but when he arrived at her belly he stopped. He didn’t know if it was because something in him still thought it was wrong or because he was waiting for Cordelia to stop him. He breathed hard making her shiver.

“Is everything okay?”

Matthew looked up at her, beautiful, perfect and a total mess “Everything is perfect, you are perfect”. 

He kissed his way down to her, holding her body in place when first reached her core. “Matthew what?”

“Let me, please” he talked so close to her that she shivered. Cordelia didn’t stop him or tried to argue so, the boy licked her. It was his first time as much as hers and it was glorious. The moans of pleasure Cordelia was trying to hold were ravishing and it was all his doing. He had to remember thanking Magnus, but later, definitely later. He kissed her and licked her, letting Cordelia arch against his mouth to get the pressure she was seeking. 

She came with a surprised gasp “Matthew, I... Wow, what?”

He laughed, moving to lay next to her naked, panting body “Catch your breath”.

She laughed and after a moment of hesitation turned to kiss him “Wow, thank you”.

“You don’t have to thank me”.

“Oh, but I want to” and she unbuttoned his shirt to trace his skin.

“Are you sure?”

“If you don’t stop asking that...” she threatened him.

Matthew laughed “Fine, fine”.

“How nice of you to indulge me” Cordelia unbuttoned his trousers and pushed them down, taking them off his long, muscled legs. Once they were both naked and laying, she kissed him, getting so close to feel him warm and hard against her leg. She let her fingers wander close to him before taking him in her small hand.

“Cordelia”.

“Tell me what’s good” and stroked him gently.

“Good”.

She stroked again, this time stronger “And this?”

“Definitely good” he took her hand in his to make her move quicker and he came like this, holding her on him, kissing her deeply. Cordelia moved only to take a towel and clean both of them. Once his hand was clean and his breath was again slow and steady, he moved it over her skin, never tired of touching, stroking or kissing it.

“Matthew, what are you doing?”

“Already tired of me?”

“Mm, let me think” she joked, while his hand was reaching her core again.

“Don’t think too long” he stopped, only one finger lingering on her heat.

“Matthew” she said in a whisper.

“Yes, Cordelia?”

“Touch me, please”.

He made her come, this time pushing one finger in her folds, while circling her with his thumb. Matthew pushed her near the edge two times before making her cry her pleasure.

“You are incredible” Matthew whispered against the skin of her breast.

“And you are a talented bastard” she answered back, laughing a little.

“Am I?”


End file.
